When does it hit you that you are a DAD?

On 27th January 2025, we were blessed with a baby boy. We spent seven days in the hospital, and every day though being an event, somehow seemed to come and go without it truly sinking in that I was now a father. The realization hit me for the first time when I had to fill in the name of my child on his birth certificate. Being someone who usually double-checks, triple-checks, and over-researches even the smallest things, I quickly entered only the first name, not realizing the full name needed to be entered. When I downloaded the certificate and saw that only the first name was listed, it struck me—my name was missing in front of my child’s name.

At that moment, I felt an overwhelming sense of responsibility. Knowing that I had made a mistake on my child’s very first official document hit me hard. It made me question myself—if I couldn’t handle such a simple task properly, how could I take on the enormous role of being a dad?

It’s been less than two weeks since his birth, but it already feels like a long time ago. These few days have taught me more about myself than I’ve learned in most of my life. Who would have thought that a tiny baby could bring such profound self-reflection?

Thankfully, the birth certificate can be corrected, and it’s not a big deal, but the event taught me something valuable—something I always knew deep down but never fully embraced. I have a tendency to seek multiple viewpoints before making any decision. While this helps in making informed decisions, it comes with a significant drawback: conflicting viewpoints shake my conviction. They make me doubt my decisions and often lead me to second-guess or change them. This means I never fully own my choices, and in the process, I lose a part of myself. No decision feels truly mine.

Another factor affecting my decision-making is time. I tend to sit on an issue without making a final call. For instance, I must have searched thousands of baby boy names over the past few days—so much so that the process became frustrating. Finally, we chose a name, but when it mattered most to enter it correctly, I made a blunder.

Meanwhile, our baby seems to have it all figured out. He knows how to drink his mom’s milk, how to poop and pass urine, and he doesn’t fuss while changing clothes. Even when he was diagnosed with jaundice and had to undergo phototherapy for 48 hours, he took it like a champ, staying calm in the blue light. It was us, the parents, who were panicking.

When have I ever been so comfortable in my own thoughts? Lately, I’ve realised how much time I waste each day, mostly watching YouTube videos in search of something meaningful. But let’s be honest—it’s like finding a needle in a haystack. I enjoy watching videos about finance, but when I reflect, I wonder how many of them have actually made a difference in my life.

What truly made a difference was back in 2020–2021, when I wrote down everything I learned about the stock market in a small diary. That process of building conviction in specific stocks yielded the best returns I’ve ever had. Most of the other stocks I picked were influenced by YouTube videos, but thankfully, I had invested the most in my first, well-researched pick. When a decision is made with conviction, it sticks, no matter what.

Now, I realize that I need to stop wasting time aimlessly watching videos, hoping to stumble upon something life-changing. Instead, I need to start organizing my thoughts, planning, and putting emotions into words. I need to study, simplify, and focus. The best strategy is a simple one. After all, an idiot with a plan is far better than a genius wandering aimlessly. And most importantly I don’t need to look for something life changing , he is literally sleeping in front of me.